Pokémon Quartz – #53
Wow, that was some serious training – it would have fit right into a generic sports movie from the ’80s if I had been blasting some power rock.
Oh god this must be some delayed reaction to the local flora.
Oh ****, the trees have become sentient and are now-
No. That is too ridiculous – even for Corna.
…or it could have something to do with that familiar-looking house…
Welp, nothing to do but take an uneventful step into-
Oh ****, it’s a cough!
Not that my phone would know…
Wait a second… that voice seems awfully familiar…
Oh not this joker again.
Wait, when did I agree to anything?
Smooth, real smooth…
Why not, it’s not like it’ll be difficult or anything. I’ll probably have to put square pegs into square holes or some **** like that.
Wait, a quiz? Already? I DON’T EVEN HAVE THE TEXTBOOK YET.
…do I feel a draft in here?*
*Because he broke the fourth wall and there’s a draft, get it?
Ugh… is it that first thing?
THANK GOD FOR MULTIPLE CHOICE QUESTIONS!
WILL SOMEONE PLEASE FIX THE WALLS IN HERE!
I’m no linguist, how am I supposed to even…
Ugh… whatever – is it the one that sounds like ‘colon’?
Goddammit, multiple choice questions.
Oh god, here comes the rape.
…or that, I guess.
At least this time I have an idea of what the answer for the second one is going to-
I hate this ****ing place.
Is it the one with the thinly veiled sorcerer hiding near the end?
Is it the really short one?
And apparently I speak Icelandic or Galician, or whatever.
I don’t know, is it?
I guess it is.
So now I need to know multiple dialects? I just don’t even anymore.
Is it the one with the audible accent over the letter?
Foreign languages always have **** like that, it’s common knowledge.
…that wind really is raging, someone should patch that wall soon before the entire ****ing building collapses.
DEAR GOD HOW MANY WALLS IS THIS PLACE EVEN BUILT WITH – IT KEEPS BREAKING THEM.
Is it the silliest sounding one?
Another fact – all foreign words sound silly. All of them.
…I’m laughing already.
WHY COULDN’T ALL THE QUESTIONS BE THIS EASY, GODDAMMIT.
Also, technically he only has four – and one thumb… unless… oh god.
So now my phone thinks it understands the Sorcerer’s Tongue? Sure, why not.
Random. ****ing. Guessing.
Sure, that sounds plausible.
Yeah, like I’ll be coming back for next time.
You have to love rewards… I guess.
Again, I won’t be…
Oh god what fresh hell is this?
GODDAMMIT JAVIER AND YOUR SORCEROUS EXITS.
No, we aren’t doing this **** all over again Javier. You’re going to let me leave now.
Javier, **** you man, **** you.
Oh thank god, no annoying quizes.
Oh dammit, annoying trainers.
With Pokemon that can’t dodge rocks.
You certainly have a high opinion of yourself for someone who got lost in some maniac’s basement.
Thanks… I guess.
I DON’T WANT THIS.
But it’s ever so shiny…
You’re making this **** far too complicated…
I guess you did, at that.
And failing at it, remember that.
My phone’s grasp of the Sorcerer’s Tongue is tenuous at best.
I… pushed the walls.
I blame the shiny ****ing mail.
Oh god I hope this ****’s over…
Get away from me, you succubus!
You know, once you stop fighting it the void is actually quite pleasan-
This place again…
Yes… that’s why… then I’ll just be on my way…
Okay I’ll just-
Why must he continue toying with me?
…he tried to hide behind a window.
I just don’t know anymore, I just don’t.
This just aren’t going to get better, are they?
Sorcery, I’d imagine.
Asskickery, I’d imagine.
Aww man, he got you too, Imakuni? That’s too bad…
How does that thing see?
Everything in Corna is a bad sign, when you think about it.
Good luck with that, I guess.
Oh thank god, I can’t allow another tantalizing mail seduce me…
I guess your prediction comes true if you make it come true, then…
STOP WATCHING ME.
Why is the password yelling at me…?
What you don’t know could fill several books, phone.
Your big no’s cannot save you now, Javier.
Oh god, please no…
IS THIS SOME SORT OF TRICK?
Oh god he’s plotting…
Wait, boulders… why?
Pacience and Science are horrible names for people, I don’t even know…
No need to hurry on my behalf… none at all.
Freedom, it tastes so sweet…
Oh yeah… where was I?
****’s about to get real.